Why road trips and kids just don't mix

Our Mum has her rant

• Loading up the car and getting on the road- It should be handy enough to load up the car and get the children into car right? Wrong. Like everything, this is the first of many battles today and by the time they decide what to wear and what to bring you will be at the end of your tether. 
• Radio or Music- It is our car but you would swear by the way the kiddies behave it is theirs, from the back they will be demanding Taylor Swift or One Direction. They cannot agree about the music so we put on the radio and they all boo about having to listen to “some old guy talk about the news” there is no pleasing them at all. 
• Opinionated mini drivers- They have no idea how to drive but yet they ask about the speed you are driving at or if you are headed in the right direction. When we do arrive later each one has an opinion on where we should park and closer to the door as we are “tired”. 
• “Are we there yet?” We are only literally after leaving our local town and already you can hear choruses of “are we there yet?” or “how much longer?” even though I explained it will take a couple of hours. They even have magazines and crayons to keep them occupied but that isn’t good enough they would much rather moan!
• “Can I go to the toilet?” well you can as soon as we pass by one and you went before we left the house. “I’m hungry/thirsty” yes you are going to starve because it has been 30 minutes since you ate and of course now you are thirsty after necking your water hence why you need the toilet. Argh! 
• “-------- Just farted” if ever was there a time when you don’t need the wailing after the smelly one has farted it is now. The kids will be clambering to wind down the windows (while we are on the motor way) while I scream to close them! 
• “I feel sick” There is always one that doesn’t handle the road trip well so be prepared with a bag and be prepared for more moaning if one does vomit as the other kids will be traumatised and more wailing ensues. 
• He did this and she did that- You would think that the kids could amuse themselves for a few hours but no. One of them will hit the other and someone will get called a rude name, and by the time you arrive at your destination the kids will not be on speaking terms! 
• Destination arrived- You have finally made it and now the battle is on to get the nippers out of the car, you think this would be easy but like everything it isn’t. They will have sore limbs from sitting still and will all be starving by now, but motor on surely there is fun to be had? 
• Home again- You survived the journey there, the trip and hopefully everyone enjoyed themselves but now you must trek home. Fingers crossed the little ones are too tired now to fart, get sick, be bored or fight amongst themselves but I very much doubt it!