There’s a reason they call it the "terrible twos", and of course just as you think you’re over that hurdle, you jump straight into the year of the "threenager".
The newborn stage is certainly challenging but for many parents, dealing with toddler tantrums is the hardest part of parenting. Here are some tips for keeping your cool when your child turns into a tornado.
The first step is to understand what’s causing the tantrum. Toddlers can’t communicate as well as older kids, so they get frustrated when you don’t know what they’re trying to say. Patience is key here and once you work out what they want they should calm down. Of course, if they want something you’ve already said no to, then don’t give in. This will only show them that tantrums are a good way of getting their own way.
If it’s because they’re tired and they’re still taking naps then that’s your cue to put them to bed. If not, they may just need to switch off and relax for a while. Just like ‘quiet time’ in creches and schools, kids need a period of ‘quiet time’ while they’re at home.
If you conclude that it’s because they’re hungry, even as adults we can absolutely sympathise. Being "hangry" isn’t fun but once you know that’s the cause, at least whipping them up something in the kitchen is a quick and easy solution.
Us mums are known for our big handbags and there’s a reason why, while we might have moved on from a changing bag there are still a multitude of things we need to have at the ready when we’re out for the day. Make sure that packing healthy snacks is a priority and you can nip an "hangry" tantrum in the bud by pulling out something you prepared earlier.
And if they’ve kicked off while you’re out and about don’t worry about being judged. Other parents have all been in your situation and will sympathise. Focus solely on your child and don’t fret about anyone else’s opinion, just because your child has a temper tantrum it doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent, it means you’re normal!
Funnily enough, my own threenager had a tantrum this morning, he was bored but couldn’t decide what he wanted to do. I went through all the options but wasn’t getting anywhere and both of us were getting frustrated. In the end, he turned to me and said "I want a hug" and that was what calmed him down. He could then relax and choose an activity and he was playing away happily a few minutes later.
The moral of the story; whatever the question, hugs are the answer!