Ever wondered how teachers can keep a class of five-year-olds quiet? Former teacher and FFHQ's Education Expert Ciara McGuane from Rahoo.ie reveals the best behaviour management strategies to steal from teachers.
Good behaviour management is seen as fundamental to effective teaching and learning.
Without harnessing the skills and strategies needed to work magic with large groups of students and individuals with differing personalities, teachers can find themselves ineffective and lost in the job. As we all know, calm classrooms are pre-requisite to children’s learning.
But what about parenting?
The same argument can be made about behaviour management and parenting; however, the home is an informal environment where classroom structures do not apply - and children don’t come with a manual!
As teachers, we receive training on behaviour management theory when we are studying initially and we put this into practice in our school placement experiences; and then we go out into the big bad world!
The first year is frightening – trying to figure out how to balance the behaviour strategies from positive reinforcement and encouragement to the disciplinary lead in the room to ensure a positive learning environment.
But we have colleagues to ask for advice, we can use a variety of techniques within a school setting (including a behaviour policy) which gives us structure and we have further training courses we can take to help us continually develop.
Parents do not have the same range of support and training! How can we expect parents to automatically know how to implement behaviour management strategies for their own children without any guidance?
Here are five strategies that most good teachers use every single day to get the best out of their students, even the most challenging. They do not require resources – just trial, error and patience.
For me, the absolute priority in effective behaviour management is the maintenance of a positive relationship with the child, as much as possible. Just because they might have done something bad, does not make them a bad person.
Give them a go and see how you get on!
1. Catch them doing good things.
What does this look like in the classroom?
Imagine you have 30 students in front of you, and you notice that Johnny (who is usually a big talker and quite distracted) is focused and concentrating on his work. I would walk over to Johnny and quietly comment that he’s doing a great job and I can see that he is really focused and ask him to talk me through what he is working on.
I have caught him doing something good and have flagged it with him.
What does this feel like for the child?
Their teacher has noticed that they are trying their best, remarked on it and shown an interest in what they are doing. They feel proud, confident and happy that they are being recognised in class.
How can you apply it to parenting?
Compliment your child when you notice them doing something good and point it out to them specifically. An example of this is my three-year-old started to turn on the sitting room lights when he gets home from child-care (mainly because he wants the room ready to watch an episode of Paw Patrol!).
How can we expect parents to automatically know how to implement behaviour management strategies for their own children without any guidance?
I complimented him for being so helpful by turning on the lights when we get in. Bless him, now he goes around turning on the hall lights and the kitchen lights too before he gets himself settled to watch his favourite TV show. This is a minor example – but it works!
Children are encouraged by positive reinforcement.
2. Tactical ignorance.
What does this look like in the classroom?
This is trickier then catching them doing good things and requires that you work on your own patience. It is also a little bit harder to explain as it requires intuition in terms of the child you are working with and a long-term strategy.
Imagine that you have 30 students in the classroom and notice that Johnny has not cleaned up his resources and papers from the previous activity, despite this being requested already.
You have been down this road before with him and it could end up being a hullaballoo if being addressed head-on and take away from the learning time and experience of other students.
I decide to ignore the mess and continue on with the lesson where I will attempt to engage with Johnny in a positive way (potentially find a way to use strategy 1).
I will arrange to speak with Johnny at the end of the lesson or day privately where I will flag the positive interaction I have had with him (and other positive traits) and then I will express disappointment about his failure to comply with earlier instruction.
I will enquire if there is anything going on with him and if he is enjoying school. I will offer my support and express my concern at his failure to comply. I will assure him that if there continues to be issues around compliance, then I will have to speak to other people (parents, principal etc.) as I would be worried about him.
What does this feel like for the child?
They did not do what they were told. They thought they were getting away with it. The teacher respectfully and kindly spoke to them. The teacher said nice things to them which made them feel good. The teacher noticed how they hadn’t done what they were meant to and said they were disappointed.
They were still nice to them but they mentioned parents and the principal too and that they were worried about them. The child is confused as they expected to be given out to. The teacher has not punished them. The child feels a bit guilty and thinks they will try to just do what they are told with that teacher.
How can you apply this to parenting?
If you notice negative behaviour, tactically ignore the behaviour. Don’t walk into a confrontation. Leave the room or find a way to not have to “confront” the behaviour in the moment (unless it’s a health and safety risk of course!) and then address it later that day or the following day in a calm fashion.
Express concern and disappointment and highlight consequences for continued misbehaviour. Speak to them with respect and kindness.
Please note: This strategy doesn’t work every time. Its effectiveness can depend on the child’s maturity and personality. It can work well to nip negative behaviour in the bud for many students but it’s not for everyone!
3. Success Criteria.
What does this look like in the classroom?
You are about to start a simple writing task with students and there are certain things they must do to write well and be successful in this task. For example, they must use capital letters, full stops etc. Before you start the task, you share these pointers as a list on the board and ensure students are on board with this.
Let’s bring it up a level.
You are taking the entire class to the local park for games and a picnic. This is your first time taking them out of the school environment. You share the success criteria and rules of this outing with them. It is extremely important that they are compliant with these steps as it poses a safety risk if they are not. By applying the criteria shared, the outing will be a success.
What does this feel like for the child?
Expectations have been shared and they know what is expected of them. There are clear boundaries for them to follow.
How can you apply this to parenting?
Before you do something with your child, discuss the expected behaviour that will make the trip (or whatever it is) a success. For example, if you are bringing them into a city, they must hold your hand, they must walk on the footpath only, they will get one treat after lunch and should not ask for other treats, etc.
You can sit down and write these down with them and afterwards reflect on the criteria and how they got on. If the trip was a success, congratulate your child and point out why it was successful. If the experience did not go well, then read strategy 4!
4. Follow-through.
What does this look like in the classroom?
You are on the way to the local park for games and a picnic with 30 students. You had gone through the success criteria of the outing. On the way there, a child pushes another child on the footpath. Luckily, the pushed child was fine and didn’t fall onto the road with traffic.
Nevertheless, this is an incident that needs to be dealt with promptly. You can’t turn a blind eye to this. You turn the entire class around and go back to the school. You do not go to the park for games and a picnic.
You follow through with consequences and tell the group that unfortunately you cannot trust them to act responsibly at the moment. They will need to earn your trust again before you will arrange such an experience for the group.
What does this feel like for the child?
For the children that did nothing wrong, this feels very unfair.
For the child who pushed another child, they feel guilty as it is their fault that the entire trip did not go ahead.
All the children know that the teacher follows through with what they have said in terms of consequences.
How can you apply this to parenting?
The beauty of this strategy is that your hands are tied – you as the leader have done nothing wrong. It is the child who has misbehaved and was aware of the consequences. You just have to follow through with them. You don’t need to get angry or have an argument. All you need to do is highlight what has happened and what this means now. Then get on with it!
If you notice negative behaviour, tactically ignore the behaviour. Don’t walk into a confrontation.
A teacher I know makes a point of making a scapegoat of one child on a low-stakes trip like a visit to the local park with a new class at the start of the year. This teacher points out that they learn quickly this way, that there is no messing and this type of behaviour should not crop up again in other trips, especially higher-stake trips which might be a trip to another town, city or country!
5. Consistency.
Simply put… It is the certainty of a sanction rather than its severity that makes it effective. If you say something, then mean it. The rules don’t change from Monday to Sunday. By providing children with consistent boundaries using these behaviour management strategies, they know where they stand and will flourish.
Good luck!
