You know how they say that sometimes you don't know what you have until it's gone? Breastfeeding is a bit like that in my opinion.

• It was the guaranteed moment of calm after a busy day. Toddlers are busy little creatures and life tends to move at one hundred miles an hour. That night-time feed which at that point was the only feed was such a peaceful moment in the day.
• It was something that only we could share. By the time your child turns two there is very little that only you can do for your child. Friends and family can offer their services for most things and they do a pretty amazing job at it too. Breastfeeding was the only thing that only I could do for him. That's such a special feeling.
• The feel good hormones. Who knew that I was still getting those after two years and with just one feed. But they were there. That feeling of happiness that kind of washed over you. The oxytocin. The love. I miss that.
• Our night-time routine was so simple. It required very little thought and was actually a really calm and lovely experience. Pjs, quick feed and instantly asleep in my arms. It's not something I feared or dreaded. It was a given. Simple and peaceful. These days it's a lot more complex.
• It was a constant. A little routine that was never tampered with. I am someone who loves to know what is happening. Regardless of how busy or stressful our days were, they always ended in the same way and it was a very comforting thing for the both of us.